Our Little Secret
I promised that I would try to post every week, and unlike some of you, I will stay true to my new year’s resolution…at least for now! The hard part usually starts in February, so I have some time!
As people, our mind is the only thing that separates us from one another. What we do, how we do it, and how it is portrayed are all contingent on the decisions we make individually. And naturally, whenever we think of an idea we always require input from others. Many of us possess the inborn reaction to text our friends as soon as we’re excited about a future endeavor. Whether that be a career path, an outfit for an important event, or just a to-do list, we are so quick to share everything without really assessing the pros and cons of it. The initial excitement consumes us to share everything with those around us because we genuinely believe in our ideas. Although it took me a long time to learn this, I realized that it is really important to guard our perspectives until we are fully confident in them. Until those plans are formulated and properly executed it is just an idea - and ideas can be taken advantage of without any consequences. I remember playing one of those freshmen year icebreaker games. The whole premise of the game was to be creative and think on your feet for a statement that would get people involved. At the time, I thought of a clever one that I was going to use, and out of pure excitement, I turned to my left to share it with the girl sitting next to me. In that brief moment, she just acknowledged it and echoed my opinion on it. Then a couple of rounds later it was her turn and she used exactly what I had shared with her earlier. It was quite unfortunate because when I got out I had nothing to say and just looked so dumb (yes, I was annoyed). Despite this example being from a game, it demonstrates how people think. In this case, it did not matter what I had said if it meant saving herself from public embarrassment. You never really know who is going to be happy for you. When you give people the authority to know your next move, you make it easier for people to walk right into your path. Not only that, but you give them permission to vocalize their opinions or pass judgment on something that you are capable of doing on your own. For example, take my blog. After I had created this website I was flooded with people telling me how they wish they had created a blog and their angst for not thinking of the idea first. Had I told these people what I was doing before completing it, this blog might not have been here today. Our endeavors are sacred things and if we do not trust the right people, then they can be taken away from us. I truly believe that this mentality goes for everything. Even if it is a color you are wearing tonight, tell the wrong soul and watch, you won’t be the only one wearing it. If there is anything I can encourage you to take into the New Year it is to be private with those you cannot trust with your entire life. It will only keep you and your intentions safe until they are ready to be publicized. That does not necessarily mean secluding yourself from other people, but instead, trusting your gut. You should always trust your capability to do it first, but if you ever need extra guidance make sure you know who’s in your corner.
With Love, Fiza Usman
